Poem: Two Slippers
Sometimes, poetry challenge comes from unexpected quarters. My son Anirudh — the reticent media personality threw a curve ball at me. I duly passed it on to Priya Patel, my poet friend. Here was his challenge, no less in Medieval English ( pardon errors, if any) :
Anirudh: I challenge thee. Can thou write a poem if thoust given only this picture? I shall post the poem on my LinkedIn tagging you.
Priya responded with a blink. I was now inevitably part of a challenge that I wanted to avoid.
Priya: I love a challenge. Got it. So doesn’t have to be a lovers challenge. Can be whatever I feel about the pic(ture).
Here is the picture that prompted the poetry challenge.
Poem: Two sides
We have walked miles together
over the past many years,
and have spent a lifetime
collecting each other’s tears;
trying to hide from mutual fears
just to realize how different we are
We have suddenly become
two sides of a thought,
together once,
but now drifted apart
and even after all the miles
we have walked together,
the weight of our journey
is no longer light as a feather;
from one, we have become
like two left feet,
struggling, like two sides
of a coin to meet,
always running to be somewhere
without ever knowing
where we were going …~ Priya © 2023
My poem came after I saw the picture again. Aha.
Poem: The One That Flipped
We have walked together
Holding hands
In lockstep and in love
On unbeaten pathsTill that cold morning -
You walked ahead
And wanted to be alone
Just to enjoy the solitude
And silence, you said.I slowed down
Just watching you
The increasing distance
And the smaller you
In the green golf course
And a lake aheadThe floating mist
Beautiful and mesmerizing
You slowly vanished
A hazy silhouette first
And then…
All that I found
Your pair of slippers
One straight and
Another upside downI wonder even now —
Should I have walked
Together with you
And not slowed down?The beautiful lake
And the mystical mist
The green grass
Would have been more beautiful
If we had walked togetherAnd I wonder too…
I remember the slippers
Between us -
Who was the one
That flipped?
~Ashok Subramanian © 2023
Anirudh wrote a detailed analysis of both the poems.
About Priya’s Poem:
Very good poem. I can see the inspiration from one of them being seen as flipped and the other inspiration from the that they are slippers. It highlights the gradual change brought over the passage of time in a relationship where both people once shared common interests for a long time.
About Ashok’s Poem:
Also a very good poem. The sources of inspiration are the same but the focus is more on one person in the relationship undergoing a sudden change due to a unique life experience that the partner of the former is unaware of. As a result, the latter person is in shock and pondering the what ifs and the shoulds. The former on the other hand, treads on a newfound path, careless, and unweary to the consequences of this new journey that would be on their relationship.
Verdict:
It is evident that Ms. Priya has taken a theme that expresses deep thought whereas you have involved vivid descriptions of nature. Also, there is an inclusion of romance in both whichever ‘relationship’ that is in your poems (Dad) and the way words are used in said descriptions which I have noticed, is your signature writing regardless of poetry/novels.
The way this came about is interesting — a picture from my son and a readymade acceptance of the challenge by Priya. Now, do you agree with Anirudh’s verdict?
~Ashok Subramanian
